The Saddest Part

My life was in your hands,
We had something,
And the secrets we shared,
They turned into you don't care,

I gave up all my shadows,
And that is the coldest truth,

And I said I would try,
I said now,
I already you my heart,
You're still somewhat empty,
And that is the sad part,

You had me looking for you,
Even when I couldn't find you,
I was willing,
And willoing has left me behind,

I'm above all this blame,
My scars bare no shame,
I loved you the best I could,

And I gave you my heart,
I would try my best,
But it wasn't enough for you,
And that is the sad part,

The coldest part,
And you know I paced you so far above me,
I placed you too far above me,

And I gave you my heart,
Like a flower in full bloom,
I gave you my heart,
Now you're love felt so damn empty,

And that is the saddest part,

My life was in your hands,
It's certainly now time for me to say good-bye,
It eneded with you . . .

The End

Nothing Lasts Forever

I sometimes think,
How it could have been,
When love was in our hands,
Saying goodbye is like rewinding,

Let me remind,

You're the star light,
My my dark times,
The voice that told me,
Everything is alright,

The reason for believing,
That maybe,
Just maybe love would last forever,

I wonder if I'm on your mind,
Do you miss the memories?
I should have never let you go,
All those lonely nights with a bottle of scotch,

You're the poieces,
To me in the belief,
That love would last,
Nothing lasts forever,

When the kies are dark,
I'll always be here,
No matter,
Please think of me too,

Nothing lasts forever

Thousand Years

My heart beats fast,
Colors and all the promises,
How to be brave,
How to be strong,

You show me,
By your love,
One step closer,
All doubts suddenly fly away,

All of my life,
I died everyday waiting,
Darling don't be afraid,
I have been searching for you,
For thousands of years,

Time stands still,
Like a rose in time,
Even if she doesn't know,
I will be brave,

I won't let anything come between us,
Everything will be alright,
One step closer,

I have died,
Waiting for this chance,
It feels like I've been loving  you for thousands of years,
Time brought us this moment,

Hush,
Be still,
Don't be afarid,
Take my hand,

One step closer,
Just another step closer,

My darling,
I died trying to look for you,
I waited,
I'll wait another thousand years,

Just to have you to love.

The End

Magnum Opus Release February 2012

MAgNUM OPUS

We aRe a great work of art . . .

2012

We weRe made iN love,

Now in liviNg pRoof,

Be Now mAde ceRTaiN,

Now iN liviNg MeMory,

We aRe oNe,

All uNique iN ouR wAys,

May God bless You PeoPle,

And ThaT you RealIze,

We Are A gReAt woRk of aRt. . .

 

ConTenTs Page:

Thanks You’s & Introduction

1.                   Magnum Opus * ( Intro ) *

2.                 Try With me

3.                 The gift of love

4.                 Heal

5.               The Breaking of Dawn * ( interlude ) *

6.                 Beautiful Reign

7.                 Glimmer of Hope

8.                 Rest in peace

9.                 Ring of Love

10.              Aurora

11.               A New Day * ( interlude ) *

12.              Footprints

13.              Quietude

14.              Faith

15.              Stairway to Heaven

16.              Give love a Chance

17.              Trust a Prayer * ( interlude ) *

18.              Shaded Grey’s

19.              The Unfolding Rose

20.            Wounded Healer

21.              Unconditional Love

22.            Dear Friend

23.            Wings of a dove

24.            Love Gives Us WiNgs * ( interlude ) *

25.            Light

26.            Tears of My Heart

27.            Live It Up

28.            The Road to Freedom

29.            Candle

30.            The Victory of Christ

31.              Set Fire To Your Reign * ( outro ) *

32.            For you  ( BONUS CUT ) * * *

33.            The ONe   ( BONUS CUT ) * * *

Thank You’s

Thank you God so much for giving me the opportunity to write and being able to share my work with so many people that I may know or not. Thank you for the trials, happiness and the road traveled to get this far and putting all this work into writing. Truly all Glory belongs to you God, Our Loving Father!

I want to thank Gerry Alphonse for continuing to inspire me and guiding me in my life in faith and as my best friend, companion and spiritual partner. May God bless you for all that you have done for me.

Mom & Dad, you’ll always be the ones in my heart. Thank you so much for giving me and the opportunities to live a beautiful life! I am so blessed to have parents like you. God bless you my Mother & Father!  

To Ian John & Anne Marie Khan, both of you, since the beginning have been there for me. As friends and as personal spiritual partners. Thank you so much for listening to me all those years ago and as friends. God bless you both!

My Brother Michael and my sister Catherine,

Both of you are an indispensable part of my life. I thank God for having such siblings like you by my side. Although we may have not been able to get along in the past, it is good to know you are doing well in your lives. May you both be blessed and always know I am here for you!

My friends, colleagues and acquaintances. Thank you all for the trials, tribulations, the joys, the sorrows, the frustrations & all the things that make life seem like an endless adventure! Thank you and God bless that I got to know such people!

Lastly, but never the least. To anyone reading this volume, I hope you will enjoy this volume. Though laced with so much of life’s intricacy, but that you appreciate life for its diversity and awesomeness in wonder! God bless you dear reader and may your reading this volume be a blessed one!

YouRs in The love of God,

James Mathew Fernandis

BehiNd The wriTing of “Magnum OPus”:

Magnum Opus was written very recently. Yet it sounded like years of effort had been put into it. Although this volume echoes with memories. It is by all means, up-to-date, frank and most of, a journey to be taken at heart.

This volume was written at separate intervals and was continuously re-written over 5 times. So this volume started with a couple of drafts. I didn’t like the outline or the outcomes of my last takes. So I wanted to start with a completely fresh new perspective, yet still staying true to the work in this volume.

Although this volume took a while to get done, I believe it was worth every inch, moment & effort. This is an intellectual, loving, experiencing, sharing and learning volume. A very different one from my last volumes of Embrace & ETERNAL. And I wanted it to be different, not repetitive. Like a road you walk along, not everything remains the same. In time things change. For worse or not, I leave that for you, the reader to decide for yourself.

The remaining part of this volume was written in Hong Kong & finally completed in Malaysia. From 2010 till recently, December 2011, was this volume completed. Each of this volume’s 31 + additional 15 pieces of poetry written at different intervals of time throughout the past 2 years, surprisingly this sounds like I was keeping a diary. Indeed this volume rightfully deserved the title of “Magnum Opus” because of the seemingly sheer amount of effort, time & love put into completing it. 

I do hope you will enjoy this volume, as much as I did writing it. Indeed, it has been a blessing to write this volume.

May God bless you dear reader and that you be blessed reading this volume!

We can lift ourselves out of ignorance, we can find ourselves as creatures of excellence and intelligence and skill.

-         Jonathan Livingston Seagul

I will give myself,

My everything and my best,

To reach you God,

Because you fulfilled my entirety,

You’re love embraces the endless stars,

The eternal love you’ve given to us,

Since the beginning of time,

Laid down in ages past and unforgotten,

History’s pages stained with sin,

Redeem us you have through Jesus Christ,

Unfailing is your love till the end . . .

- Memoirs of James Mathew Fernandis

The postponed volume and "The Breaking of Dawn":

Introduction to “the breaking of dawn”

          It’s a surprise as to wonder, why I cancelled the release of my previous effort “Light” for a more subdued volume I now call,” the breaking of dawn”. Indeed one would ask, why the concept and complete departure from my previous ideas?

All interesting and will be answered in this new volume.

          Indeed, I am not one to just cancel and leave things undone, as such, I am a disciplined person and disciplinary in such a way, I always finish what I started; this new volume is no different. In terms of concept, innovation and execution, “the breaking of dawn” is my most accomplished volume to date.

          The amazing thing is that in order for me to realize this volume, I had to cancel my current volume. Because I felt the direction, the theme and the written materials were going in a different way than anticipated. The difference about writing a book and a volume of poetry, is that in books, you have pre-thought story lines whilst, that you can plan ahead and adjust according to whatever situations or plots in the story line. For poetry it isn't as rigid, yet more creative and in many cases spontaneous which a lot of people may not be as flexible, as when writing normally.

         Poetry is no laughing matter in writing and though patterns of styles in writing have a habit of inhibiting writers from exploring their true potential. Poetry is still a new focus of concentration in certain countries and it is indeed a worthy area of study, due to it's rich historical significance and heritage with which it has given to writing and entertainment in the past. Even today, poetry written centuries ago, have profound influence on modern culture, writing and understanding. 

          I spent the last couple months writing, since the release of “Embrace” and was inspired to come up with another volume. I read, thought, created, wrote, drafted and tried to finalize so many pieces. It would inevitably lead people to think I was crazy. But I am not, as in this aspect, I wanted to push my own boundaries and write like never before. To be free, but to focus on a specific person or subject, in this case God. A volume of poetry, which would be different from my entire efforts in the past, for I believe it is always good to something different from previous efforts. So I came out with so many drafts of poetry themes, front covers and in cover photos. I chose from a huge array of different angles, styles, fonts, colors and even went as far as talking to people about ideas for a volume. But nothing seemed to work. Even “Light” my supposed release would eventually be scrapped. Because the direction within the coming months of my work, would go in a completely different direction.

          Writing and coming up with “the breaking of dawn”, would be tough and a daunting task, because I wanted to make sure that it was somewhat different from “Embrace” and that it would stand out on it’s own. A task, I can assure was not easy to accomplish, but a very enjoyable experience to go through.

          “The break of dawn” would stretch the boundaries, tear the norms and open up new paths to writing and literature. Especially in today’s world where so much of culture is drawn from the media, TV and the Internet. I wanted to write a volume that would return us back to the days before the Internet. When there was appreciation for simplicity, acceptance for one another and our differences. And for simple truth.

          So as you can read, this volume is a fresh new start and a brand new entry into a new realm of poetry as an art. The difference is my work is that, it is not meant to paint beautiful pictures; those days of writing are long gone. But to write about life and in doing so, I try to give life, by empowering people with the chance to choose for themselves and therefore liberating them from the world’s so called “modern culture”.

          We are human and as such, should be treated like humans. We are not mere robots and we should never hold ourselves back. Have no fear and take my hand. Let me take you on a journey that touch bases about God and that discovering a life in faith, hope and love is an enjoyable one. Of course I do not deny any hardships and tribulations, what I can promise is that you can live a life of your own. As physical wealth is not everything. For sustenance maybe, but it cannot to give life to others as what faith, hope and love can. It's all about sharing and this volume is my sharing to you guys!

          I hope you enjoy this volume and most certainly hope you will share it, love it and live it in your own ways. It is time for us all to realize our true potentials; “the breaking of dawn” is for us all! God bless everyone!

Prayer (Dedication to World Youth Day, Madrid, 2011)

prayer

Come sit with me,

Stay a while,

Do not fear,

You will come to no harm,

I want to share something you,

I want to show you what love is,

Let us kneel together,

For though much time has passed,

It is only right,

Now of all times,

Is to utter a prayer,

For what you are about to receive,

Hold my hand,

Listen to with your mind,

Listen with your heart,

Reach out with your entire mind,

Feel with all your soul,

Understand with your heart,

Sit with me and pray,

The power of prayer,

A simple minute of silence,

To daily hours of solitude in contemplation,

Are said throughout the world,

Echoing through all time,

Feel the voices,

The hopes,

The love,

The faith,

The belief,

The reconciliation,

And the sharing in prayer,

In unity, heart, mind, body and soul,

So listen with me,

In sweet silence,

Of a simple prayer,

Uttered not just for us,

But for mankind,

For in prayer,

We are united in divinity,

We are powerful,

And we are doing something to change,

The heart and mind of change,

Is rooted in the beliefs of a life in prayer,

So sit with me and pray,

Utter for me a prayer,

I'll utter for you one,

Famillies come together,

Communities around the world come as one,

In union of belief,

The power of a prayer has won,

With all the love we bear,

For all the trials life throws at us,

For tribulation that stirs and threatens us,

For all the sorrows, grief and woe of thorns,

Fear not,

Sit with me and pray,

Because I love you,

I care for you,

Let me be your step,

Let me sacrifice myself,

So that you might believe,

That you might hear my prayer,

To a path in the light,

Can you see it?

My family,

Your care, patience and sacrifice,

My friends,

Your love, dedication and sacrifice,

God,

Your unflailing love and dedication,

Jesus Christ,

Your unfailing love and sacrifice,

Our Mama Mary,

Your loving grace as a Mother's love for her children,

Come sit with me,

Stay a while,

Let me share with you,

An awesome power,

Untold throughout history,

Unmatched in simplicity,

Pure as light,

Has battled the darkness to take flight,

For as I am now to you,

We bear witness now and forever,

The love of a life in prayer,

Is the love that lasts past the edges of time,

For love and prayer go hand-in-hand,

So do you hear it?

The sweet silence,

Of prayer,

Hear,

Feel,

Understand and be aware,

So come with me,

Sit and stay a while,

Let me share a little gift with you,

Give me some of your time,

Your precious time,

Kneel with me,

Let me show,

The power of a prayer.

the end

“Put on love, which is the bond of perfection”

(Colossians 3:14)*

* Dedication to World Youth Day, Madrid, 2011 - from 16th - 21st August 2011

A Walk Through The Night

a walk through the night

Washing away,

All the tears inside,

So many years,

Scarred by memories,

Feeling of tears help deep inside,

But you came along,

My friend,

You taught me to look at the stars,

Even in the night of my life,

You helped me to embrace that part,

A part of myself was left outside,

Alone and in the rain,

Many would have had a doubt,

Many came to save my life,

Even one of them died for my love,

A walk through the night,

As I drive my car in Camerons,

Feel the wind in my face,

The sun in the sky,

Oh God I'm glad I'm still alive,

That I might live another day,

But in the instance I would face,

Everything I had had been taken away,

Even the life inside my eyes,

This road I'm going without a trace,

I had to die within myself for grace,

Part of myself was left outside,

Alone and in the rain,

It's okay to have doubts,

Many came to save my life,

Even one of them gave theirs for mine,

A walk through the night,

It's not so easy to forget,

All the trauma left,

Inside myself,

All the marks left inside my heart,

And people don't know,

Yet they only see me smiling,

Inside I was a wreck,

That’s why I just keep silent,

At the very end,

God was in my life till this day,

He took my hand,

And led me the way,

That it would be okay,

He walked me through the night.

the end